When I was pregnant with my daughter Caia, everyone was so nice to me. I always had the best snacks, the most comfortable seat, and everyone always asking me how I was feeling. My husband would get me anything and everything I needed whenever I needed it. Fast forward to when Caia was born, bam! no more attention to me. Everyone was so focused on my daughter and I was left in the dust. I no longer got the most comfortable seats, best snacks or anyone asking me how I was doing. It was like I left the Earth.

Now I am not saying I am jealous of my daughter. That is not the case at all. I was so happy to have her here. It was just so hard for me to realize how forgotten I suddenly was. Anytime I got a text from a family member it was always, “How is Caia?” Never did I get a text asking how I was running on no sleep. I felt like everyone in my life didn’t care about me anymore. I remember one time I went over to my parents’ house to work out. I went without my daughter. The disappointment on my mom’s face was hard to see. I felt so small in that moment. I was kind of like, hello, remember me? your daughter?

I am not saying in anyway this is the cause of postpartum disorders. Obviously hormones play a huge role and genetics. I know I still would have gotten postpartum OCD no matter what. However, I do think this can contribute to making them worse. For me, motherhood was one of the hardest adjustments to my entire life. I had never felt so out of control or unlike myself. Then on top of that, my family forgot me. I was basically invisible. They couldn’t see that my entire world was crumbling and I was hanging on by a thread. They just saw a happy mom.

After being in therapy, I learned that I STILL matter. I am still the same Caroline I was before I had a baby. I just have an exciting new addition. I shouldn’t be neglected by the people in my life. I deserve happiness just as much as the next person. I hope if you are reading this, that you realize you matter too. You deserve all the happiness in the world and to be loved by your family, not forgotten by them. Do not neglect yourself as a mom. You need to be happy too.